‘Everyone loved JJ’: Cyclist killed in car crash remembers his infectious energy

KALAMAZOO, MI – Jeffrey Lillard has a large photo behind his desk in his office at Western Michigan University.

In the picture, his son Jeffrey Lillard Jr. can be seen zoomed in on his face and smiling at the camera.

Lillard Jr., affectionately known to friends and family as “JJ,” died on Sept. 29, nine days after he was hit by a car. He rode his bike to his job as an administrator at WMU. He was 24.

JJ’s death was a shock, said his father, Jeffrey Lillard. The family is still learning to deal with it.

“We all still believed he would make it,” Jeffrey Lillard said. On his desk were JJ’s death certificate and a stack of memorial cards.

JJ’s sister Janessa Lillard is only “20%” accepting of the fact that her brother is gone. She still sees JJ in her dreams. It hurts to wake up to the reality of JJ not being here.

After a dozen surgeries, JJ, an avid biker, died of a brain hemorrhage a week after the accident, Jeffrey Lillard said.

“They said it was a miracle that he got where he was. … He was in perfect health, he is 24 years old. He’s young,” Jeffrey Lillard said. “It hit like a brick.”

Kalamazoo County Undersheriff Michelle Greenlee said a decision on whether to recommend charges against the driver will be sent to the district attorney after the autopsy report is completed.

Everyone loves JJ

Jeffrey Lillard has worked at WMU for 31 years. But JJ knew more people than he did after just two years at WMU. People started recognizing Jeffrey Lillard as JJ’s father, the elder Lillard said.

JJ greeted everyone with a smile and an “aggressively” firm handshake or fist bump, Jeffrey Lillard said.

Meeting JJ was like a “shock” to the system, said JJ’s sister Janessa Lillard.

“Society works a certain way and he’s just completely outside that box,” Janessa Lillard said.

JJ walked in and out of rooms full of strangers knowing everyone.

“Jay didn’t believe in strangers,” Lillard said. “He didn’t like it when anyone around him wasn’t smiling or having a good day.”

More than 1,000 people attended JJ’s memorial service, Jeffrey Lillard said. Some knew JJ from his studies at Kalamazoo Valley Community College, his membership in WMU’s Fellowship of Christian Athletes, or JJ’s love of music in the Vine neighborhood.

“Everyone loved J,” Jeffrey Lillard said. “I loved everyone.”

JJ was “a light to a lot of people,” Jeffrey Lillard said. He wrote poetry and performed at readings in Kalamazoo and Grand Rapids. And he always had a “Motivational Monday” word ready for those around him.

At a memorial service hosted by JJ’s friends at WMU, they played one of his poems over the loudspeaker.

Jeffrey Lillard instinctively began looking around for JJ.

JJ had a lot of energy, said his best friend Devyn Abdullah-Bush. He was also a good listener.

“JJ is the only friend I ever had who hit on me every day,” Abdullah-Bush said.

Fifteen years into their friendship, they developed an elaborate handshake that they did every time they said goodbye, along with the words “I love you.”

But when they left a poetry reading the night before the car accident, they forgot the handshake.

“I wish I could have gotten the last ‘I love you’ in,” Abdullah-Bush said. “But sometimes when things are known, they don’t need to be explained.”

“The Flash” in the flesh

While JJ was in the hospital, one of his legs was amputated. He was an example of resilience, so family and friends compared him to a superhero like The Flash.

JJ loved riding his bike, regardless of the distance. Janessa Lillard rode her bike past her brother on the street, often wearing a white tank top.

Abdullah-Bush called JJ after he passed him and asked, “Did I just see you on your bike?” Do you know how cold it is?” But JJ never felt it.

“He constantly did his best,” Abdullah-Bush said.

JJ’s last “big adventure” was the five-hour bike ride to Grand Rapids to perform at a poetry reading.

No one could tell him not to do something he set out to do.

A JJ-sized void

For Janessa Lillard, it’s hard to imagine a day when she’ll overcome the first stages of grief. Every day brings different memory triggers.

For Jeffrey Lillard, “Sometimes it Snows in April” by Prince & The Revolution is a trigger.

For Abdullah-Bush, it’s SZA’s album “SOS.” When the album was released, JJ found it on Satellite Records because he knew Abdullah-Bush had to have it.

Janessa Lillard and JJ have several half- and step-siblings. But she was always closest to JJ, she said.

“He’s the only sibling who actually brags about me being his sister,” Janessa Lillard said. “We claimed each other… everyone knew we were related.”

They even told stories in pairs.

JJ would conjure up a memory and Janessa Lillard would explain the backstory to whoever else was around.

One time the two of them ordered pasta with their mother and her mother mispronounced “parmesan.” Afterward, JJ would say “par-me-shein” out of nowhere for a laugh, Janessa Lillard said.

Now Janessa Lillard is left with a wealth of inside jokes and shared experiences that only JJ understands.

She used to expect her future children to meet her “Uncle JJ,” but now that will never happen.

Janessa Lillard, JJ and Jeffrey Lillard always joked about naming their future daughter “Janessa Jr.”, Janessa Lillard said.

“Girls don’t get juniors,” her father would say.

“If you get one, I get one,” she replied.

But now her daughter Janessa Jr.’s name is no longer negotiable, Janessa Lillard said.

Because then her daughter will also be JJ.