Somebody Somewhere Season 3 Episode 6 Recap

Someone Somewhere

As much as I like not feeling

Season 3

Episode 6

Editor’s Rating

5 stars

*****

Photo: Sandy Morris/HBO

SAAAAAAAAM! SAMANTHA MILLER! You’re breaking my cold little heart into a million little pieces and I want you to stop right now. I don’t know about you, but I watched several scenes from it Someone SomewhereIn the penultimate episode (heartbreak again), I peek through my hands while covering my eyes like I’m watching a (charming) horror movie. When Sam went on her date with Iceland, I felt like a mama bird sending her baby bird out into the world, and I could only watch as this sweet baby bird tried to be brave and do things outside of her comfort zone. Only now is my anxiety level returning to normal. The thing is, the date is going so well! Or it happens until Sam gives up on himself in the middle. She’s had issues with not giving other people a chance in the past – Tricia pointed this out to her last season during Sam’s fight with Joel – but if anything, this season really shows us that the person Sam doesn’t give a chance to , she is herself. I am Mr. Holland’s opus– I’m just thinking about it.

The structure of this episode – written and directed by Lennon Parham – is a marvel. While it’s certainly about The Date and Sam being out there and the fallout from that, it’s also very much about Sam and Joel getting back together. Even though Sam confronted her friend about sharing her personal stuff with his boyfriend, things aren’t quite the same between them. Sure, one of the reasons Sam hasn’t talked much about Iceland is because she’s scared, defeatist, and overwhelmed, but the fact that she confided in Tricia about the entire situation before telling Joel about it.

The episode is accompanied by conversations between the two friends. On the first day of dating (though even we as the audience don’t know this yet), Sam and Joel meet at Chef’s where she doesn’t mention anything about her plans. Admittedly, they have a lot to talk about, as Joel comes in hot having just caused a fender bender – his over-the-top reaction to it suggests he’s just killed someone – while he’s overly involved and emotional over the Glennon Doyle episode is We can do difficult things Podcast he is currently listening to. The revelation that the person who beat Joel was the smallest, oldest woman and his “What have I done?” reaction is top notch. Sam can see that Joel is spiraling out of control, and she’s the one talking about having sleepovers like they used to, with tinis and tickle fights and maybe sobbing a little about Richard Dreyfuss’ biggest role. It’s exactly what Joel needs, and even though he doesn’t know it since he’s the only one crying here, it’s exactly what Sam needs too.

Tricia is the only one who finds out what Sam is up to and is on the list Someone Somewhere As far as characters that would do the most to ease anxiety, she would be at the bottom. (Even though she was so nice a few short episodes ago, reminding Sam that no one knows what they’re doing, etc., I still cry about it.) I yell at Sam as she walks out the door to She’s wearing her outfit, putting a curl in her hair and definitely thinking about how lip gloss doesn’t exactly have the most calming look, but moments later we see that Sam is actually following that advice. This scene where Sam is preparing for her date is another example of this Someone Somewhere operates on a higher level than so much of what’s on television. It’s quiet and short, yet tells us everything we need to know about Sam’s feelings. She keeps changing her shirt, keeps fiddling with her hair, and eventually bursts into tears. Then she pulls herself together, tries to remind herself that this isn’t a big deal, and writes herself a little note. We see exactly how nervous and scared she is – but more importantly, we see her resilience. Friends, she’s still on that date. Later, she’ll tell Joel that she’s really trying so hard to make positive changes in her life, and we know she’s telling the truth – we see it right here.

One of the best things about Sam Miller is the fact that despite her crippling self-esteem issues and fear of rejection and abandonment, the woman can’t help but be herself. She never tries to hide who she is – she doesn’t buy a whole new wardrobe for this date, nor does she act like she’s confident and carefree knocking on Iceland’s door. She’s sweetly open with him about how nervous she is, and yes, she’d really like Wesley to be her emotional support pup. But Iceland is also nervous – and he definitely combed his hair for that. He’s so into her.

Their little walkabout date is so awkward and wonderful. Eventually, Sam even admits that she’s written a list of things to talk about in case things get weird. Iceland demands to read it and answer every question she has for him about dogs, music and Iceland. Guys, when Sam makes another self-deprecating joke and Iceland says matter-of-factly, “I don’t like the way you’re always putting yourself down,” I had to pause the episode. I had to process. What a statement! I guess my bar is on the floor, but what a perfect and beautiful thing to say to this woman. Iceland!!

Their conversation is flirty in its own way, things are going great, and the moment seems right for Island to lean in for a sweet kiss. It’s great…until it’s not. Sam is overwhelmed. She starts to cry and backs away. Iceland is worried that he upset her, but that wasn’t something he did. By way of explanation, Sam utters a devastating sentence: “Maybe I don’t have the emotional infrastructure for this.” They keep walking – Iceland is desperate to fix this – but you know Sam is thinking about it now and whatever magic was brewing is gone is.

I’ve never been so grateful that Sam and Joel had already planned to stop by in person that evening. The evening begins with a discussion of Joel’s current state of mind, which is, um, not great. Sam knows that the sobbing over the little car accident doesn’t really have anything to do with the car or the sweet old lady, and in fact Joel breaks down in tears and talks about how good his life is, how great things are with Brad and with Sam is and… Still, he feels like something is missing. “What’s wrong with wanting a little more?” Sam asks. When Sam brings up religion, he actually starts to cry. She thinks he should go to Pastor Deb, even though he feels like he’s burned that bridge. Why doesn’t he just try and see what happens? What’s the harm in trying?

But soon Joel has a heart-to-heart with Sam. He wants to know something about her life. And finally she tells him about Iceland, the date and the kiss. When he asks her how she feels about all this, I can’t imagine he expected the vulnerable, heartbreaking answer she gives. She tells him how much she likes Iceland and how it all brings up deep, ingrained feelings of self-hatred. “I keep thinking about what if he met me…how could he want that?”

The feeling is more than enough to break your heart when you think about how Sam still sees himself, but you know what really brought me to tears? The speed with which Joel responds, “How could he not?” Full disclosure: I’m in tears right now just writing about it. Everyone needs a friend like Joel. This is not news, but it bears repeating.

Joel turns Sam’s advice around: Why don’t you just try and see what happens? And the episode ends with this second conversation between the two friends, where they laugh and cry and screw up some donuts together. Sam and Joel’s friendship is stronger than ever and both are better off for it.

• Only Someone Somewhere could find in those disgusting foot scrubs a perfect metaphor for Sam, who is working hard to make changes in her life. Sam tells Joel how the scrub they’re doing for their slumber party will work: At first it’ll be scary, then it’ll be disgusting, and then you’ll have the baby-strongest, softest feet you’ve ever seen. In life, sometimes you have to shed parts of your old self, and that’s going to be hard and maybe gross and definitely scary, but, oh baby, on the other end? That’s the good thing.

• “What? Sometimes I just want to be a bad, bad boy!” Fred tells Joel and Sam when he’s caught picking up a cheeseburger and fries from the chef. Fred Rococo forever!!

• Why am I so proud of Tricia for doing her job so well? As she practices her presentation with Sam for a cancer research fundraiser for Mitch, I just wanted to hug her. It’s the mama bird energy that brings out this show, I’m telling you. While I can’t hug a fictional character (yet), I’ll settle for Sam and Tricia’s obvious song/giggle fest.

• “Well, if you don’t like ‘Clair de lune,’ you’re an asshole, aren’t you?”